but, so, he didn't. but it made me think about how people would view him differently if he did, so i started thinking about how i never knew or was able to speak to any of the obscure figures i have been taught to respect. never talked to gandhi, was never able to size him up the way I size up the more little, more tangeable people of my real life. if he was ever a person with flaws all over his face and his hands, as i suspect he must have been, as i see we all become, he is that no longer. he, like so many others, has slipped away leaving the ability for others to judge them behind. i mean even in the movie his sexism was hailed as true love. who has done this while living? and why is it that men and women entangled in the given niceties of american culture, one laced with dependency on judgement, respect themselves for respecting the dead while tearing down the living in order to get on top? there is no top. but as america climbs more and more diagonally nowhere, our blindness has caused us to believe we are getting closer to one. ehh, maybe. that war can be morally superior to peace. that to level out a human being like a colored plastic player on a board will make them easier to defeat. that humans must gain dignity, instead of being handed it. as long as we are still all in this world together, we are unable or unwilling to forgive and bend. as soon as that is no longer the case, our walls of separation fall. i will not provide anomaly for this. i think that you either see it or you do not.
rip, nobody.
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I love it. The part about america moving upwards diagonally to nothing reminded me of that conversation we had about feminism and how people believe it's not necessary because "we've evolved." Somehow we feel comfortable enough to look at ourselves and say we're better, we're stronger, we're smarter. But we're not. I think until we realize that our own history matters in the day to day, we can't break that bound. It goes back to the beggining of your note - to how the daily grind does or does not connect to Ghandi, Mandela, the sorts of people we build our ideas with. We're stuck in a pattern of disconnect, but I'm getting further from the point, so I'll cease.
ReplyDeleteAnd you're right, an anomaly isn't necessary, you see it or you don't.
I see it. I'm really glad you're doing this, Em. It's really great. I also love the part about America climbing diagonally and getting nowhere. I love all of it. Keep writing, I'll keep reading.
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